The Week That Were: 10.15.11

Written October 16th, 2011 by MaliBuckeye

Today, we join with racing fans in mourning the loss of Indianapolis 500 champion Dan Wheldon. As such, this week’s soundtrack has a bit of a somber tone. We give ESPN/ABC a lot of criticism, but they got this one right- Thoughts and prayers with his family and friends.

When will it stop?

This week was very very special across the college sports landscape, as special teams highlights and gaffes were the order of the day across the nation. First, the “Woah! Did that just happen?” moments…

When Clemson and Maryland met, the undefeated Tigers should have known that something was swirling that could have put a blemish on their dream season.  For starters, the Terrapins chose a uniform that didn’t look like a condiment tray this week, choosing instead the “Fancy Hot Sauce” look. Maryland opened up an eighteen point lead in the second quarter on the Tigers, and nothing in the Michelle Obama playbook was working at all.  Then, Sammy Watkins happened, all 345 total yards of his offense, including a special teams play that turned the tide for good.

However amazing his individual performance was for the night, the special teams highlights for the day happened in the “Battle Of The Oil Money”, where T. Boone Pickens University traveled to Austin and found themselves in a shootout with the Longhorns.  It was one of those games where you were certain that the last team with a series of possession would win… unless there was time for a kickoff or two: Read More

Picks for the Weak: Week 2

Written September 9th, 2011 by Joe Dexter

 

You're WEAK if you picked Notre Dame in Week 1 - Brian Kelly

There ain’t no thunderstorm bright enough, ain’t no rain storm long enough, ain’t no computer smart enough –to keep me from helping you weaklings! Week 1 is in the books, and though I finished sub .500 in the first week of our picks, I am spry and ready to prove that Week two is my week!

Okay, so finishing 4-5 wasn’t so bad in our first round of games. Considering TCU was a lock ( son of a). Notre Dame never loses in week one right?? (Fight this Irish) I thought Ducks fly together? I guess not when you spread em’ out in Dallas.

Breakdown of Week 1:

So just how ugly was it in the very first analysis for our panel? If your name starts with an E and ends with @tBBC then you’re smilin’ this week.  If you’re the dope that writes this article, then you are just happy you tied the computer! Apparently anyone named Joe is a week 1 WEAKLING. Here is a look at this week’s results.

Experts (David Fox/Yahoo!): 7-2

Eric: 6-3

Mali: 5-4

Jim: 5-4

Joe D: 4-5

Computer: 4-5

Joe L 3-6

Props going to David Fox, for boldly picking Baylor over the favored Horned Frogs. He said it in the interview, this defense has a lot of work to do. Fox’s only lost came from Notre Dame and Oregon.

Eric went toe-for-toe, but chose TCU instead of Baylor. Let’s just say he has been wishing bad things upon the Bears all week. Don’t worry Eric, the whole panel was. The Bulls and Bears swept the panel in week 1.  Eric says this is a true sign from the football gods that TCU belongs in the Big East.

And well, with the Irish, we are used to this by now aren’t we?

The panel got back on track with sweep wins by selecting Oklahoma over Tulsa and Mizzou over Miami (OH).

Week Two Analysis:

Speaking of those Wacos, this week’s guest writer Lisa Horne of Fox Sports.com and I discuss Big Ten and SEC expansion and the Big 12′s role in it to open things up. Lisa then helps us break down Michigan/ND (EWW), Arizona State/Missouri, Auburn/Mississippi State and Wisconsin/Oregon State with us. A very solid interview with Lisa, as she brings us her great football knowledge. And yes, she chose Michigan, but what else was she supposed to do? Take Notre Dame?

Picks of the Weak: Week 2 With Lisa Horne by The Buckeye Battle Cry

Now it’s time to get to the Games!

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Gator Bowl: Mississippi State vs. Michigan

Written January 1st, 2011 by MaliBuckeye

Don’t forget to join us on Saturday for our All Day Livechat! Better than exchanging Christmas gifts, for sure.

Another game that we should do a better job at previewing. Well, that’s one resolution already screwed up…

Seal of excellence

Mississippi State (8-4, 4-4 SEC) vs. Michigan (7-5, 3-5 Big T1e1n)

January 1, 2011 1:00 PM ET

History

This is the sixth oldest bowl game, and has been played every year since 1946. For Buckeye fans, it’s pretty forgettable.  The mission of the Gator Bowl Association is to “provide Northeast Florida with the very best in college athletics and related activities in order to maximize positive impact on the area’s economy, national image and community pride”, and they have a president who’s one of the few honest members of bowl committees across the country, saying they don’t care about football, only about money.

Read More

The Week That Were: 9.26.09

Written September 28th, 2009 by MaliBuckeye

Finishing what Jeff started, as we do every week.

Here’s this week’s soundtrack/music to piss off the people in the cubicle next to you.

Every season, there’s one or two weeks that just screw up everything. From the Vegas lines, to the “pundit’s choices”, to alumni plans for Bowl Game Tailgating, and even the coaching hot seats get impacted by what actually manifests on the fields of play.

Welcome to that week. Be it the weather, the injuries, the flu, whatever- some astounding and amazing stuff happened over the past few days.

The top teams all continue to cruise along, with the exception of Florida who lost their Heisman Trophy fullback that throws the ball to one of the poorest pieces of blocking I’ve ever seen:

Up 31-7 late in the third quarter, you have to wonder why Tebow (who also suffered with the flu all week) was even in the game. Sure, the Gators won, but at what cost? At least they’re not Baylor, who lost their all-amazing QB to injury on Saturday.

Alabama and Texas rolled, so there’s really nothing to talk about there. But number 4 Mississippi either completely spit the bit against the Old Ball Coach (emphasis on “old”, as in “formerly good”), or revealed that their ranking was based on the smoke and mirrors of a bowl win against a not very good TTU team.

Then, number 5 State Penn went down against Iowa for the second straight year. This time, at home in a game characterized by sloppy fourth quarter play:

Your friends may have high-fived you, but your mother is pretty embarrassed right about now

Your friends may have high-fived you, but your mother is pretty embarrassed right about now

The six possessions that PSU had in the second half included 4 turnovers, a blocked punt, and a blown field goal. What did we learn in unHappy Valley? Either 1) Scheduling cupcakes may not be a healthy diet, 2) The Hawkeyes have got the Lions figured out, 3) PSU might want to rethink the whole “white out” idea, since it’s not a guarantee and may add more pressure, 4) If you decide to go to the “white out” in a costume, be prepared to look like an idiot on national tv….

Rolling right along, number 6 Cal got absolutely worked by the Oregon Knights. As one Cal fan said to me on Saturday- “looks like we started our late season collapse a bit early… you know, to get it out of the way.” Good thinking, that. What’s ironic is that for once, the Ducks didn’t have the ugliest uniforms in the Pacific Northwet. Perhaps they should stick with the classic look; and perhaps the Seahawks should fire whoever came up with those monstrosities. Fire them with real fire.

Number seven LSU needed a late game goal-line stand to hold off Mississippi State, and number 8 Boise State cruised. Number nine Miami dropped an ACC tilt against Virginia Tech- I guess discussions of their resurgence were a bit premature, no? Number ten was idle, and we’ve covered number 11 VaTach. U$C took vengeance on all things Washington by pounding the ‘Cougs. We’ll get to lucky number 13 in a bit- fourteenth ranked Cincinnati and fifteenth ranked TCU both squeaked by their unranked opponents. Number sixteen TBPU destroyed the school of one of my favorite coaches, while Houston earned their number seventeen ranking with a win over Texas Tech (great coaching hire). Elsewheres in the top 25, Georgia held off unranked Arizona State in Tempe and North Carolina fell to Georgia Tech. Florida State… well, they’re Florida State.

Other “interesting” games- Notre Ame needed to rally to beat Purdue (!), Washington proved that it couldn’t keep the momentum going by dropping to Stanford, and Mich1gAAn needed some serious home cooking from the officials to ensure a victory over Indiana.

You read that right, the Hoosiers almost beat TTUN in Ann Arbor. I really hope their QB can hold up until November.

Soo… let’s talk a bit about the number 300. Saturday marked the three hundreth consecutive sell out at Nebraska, a feat that dates back to 1962. That’s a ton of games, as the Sullivans can attest. The Huskers/Bugeaters celebrated with cool throwback uniforms and by beating the andouille out of the Ragin Cajuns of Louisiana Lafayette. Best quote about the streak? “Congratulations, Nebraska fans, for preserving the lone streak Steve Pederson and Bill Callahan couldn’t destroy” Here’s to 300 more, Husker fans.

But that wasn’t the only 300 on Saturday- Ohio State’s Jim Tressel marked his 300th game as the Buckeyes squared off against the Fighting (kinda’) Zooks of Illinois, in the battle for the ugly turtle. Tressel entered the game 220-77-2 and left the game 221-77-2, after #13 Ohio State handed a 30-0 (300?) beating to the Illini. It was a game that saw a bit of everything- a tribute to Woody (0 passing yards in the first half), going for it on fourth and goal (late in the game, too…), and defensive lineman Doug Worthington attempting to fly. Major kudos for anyone who can send me video of the leap of doom. UPDATE- BuckeyeSki from Eleven Warriors with the assist! Thanks man-


Obscure Schools update: Tuskegee was triumphant in the Gateway Classic, while Wartburg easily handled Loras at home.

Coming this week: Conference games continue, as LSU and Georgia kick off the SEC in earnest. Cal tries to rebound against U$C, and Indiana hosts the Buckeyes. The first annual “nicknames that make me giggle” game as Mich1gAAn and MAChigan State square off.

“It’s Ty Willingham’s Fault”- Washington travels to Notre Ame. War Tiger rolls into Rocky Top, and OU heads to the sunny beaches of Miami. Illinois hosts Penn State, Nebraska is off, and TCU welcomes SMU.

And here’s a friendly video from the Mich1gAAn Department of Tourism:

Back Thursday with a visit from June Cleaver’s favorite neighbor.

The Week That Were: 9.19.09

Written September 21st, 2009 by MaliBuckeye

previously on TWTW…

Here’s the soundtrack for today’s journey in the past. And no, unlike some people, it’s not really Journey.

Arrr, yesterday’s games fell on the national holiday o’ “Talk Like a Pirate Day“. Should we be surprised, then, that the upset o’ the day happened at a place whar people show up in boats? Ahoy, and it warn’t the team that we expected t’ see success.  In Piratey news, East Carolina lost to North Carolina. Great Neptune’s mandibles!!

Ok, that’s enough.

But, like TLAPD, the U$C choke to an unranked conference team should become a national holiday, since it happens more frequently than leap year. And given that 5 of the last 6 of these losses have come on the road in the Northwet, there must be something more significant going on. Perhaps the Curse of DB Cooper or something.

Nevertheless, the Trojan Tragedy has sent ripples throughout the college football world. In Los Angeles, fingers are pointing at Surfer Pete, asking again why the coach is unable to keep his team focused. Granted, the starting QB and safety were banged up, but given U$C’s deep pockets of five star talent you’d think they’d be able to beat a team that was 1-15 in their last sixteen games. A team of young men recruited by Ty Willingham. Hmmm… where have we heard that before?

While a post game let-down is to be expected, it didn’t hamper Ohio State who headed to Cleveland and shut out the #5 team in NCAA offense. Toledo, fresh off of their clown stomping of Colorado, was held to 210 total yards and 13 yards rushing. Ohio State’s rebound included 370 yards of offense from “Lebron in Cleats”. Mich1gAAn fans? That’s how you beat Toledo.

To celebrate the “Mistake by the Lake” and the Ohio State recovery, the AP poll decided to drop USC from 3 to 12, and bump tOSU from 11 to… 13. The Buckeyes were jumped by Chokelahoma, who took care of Tulsa on Saturday. However, the team that handed OU their loss got pummeled at home; BYU lost 54-28 to Free Shoes University. And yet, the Sooners didn’t suffer due to the loss of the team that beat them… This, among other things, is the reason that we need to do away with polls until October. But you knew this already.

Around the mid-west, Mich1gAAn managed to cruise against a directional school after struggling in the first half. Notre Ame was the beneficiary of back to back boneheaded decisions by MAChigan State’s sophomore QB, first overthrowing a wide open receiver in the end zone, then sealing the game with an interception at or near the endzone. Penn State continued their “Hosting Hostess” tour, although they did allow Temple to score on their vaunted defense.

SEC action witnessed Auburn holding off the weather and WVa (rats- a burning couch goes great with rain), Arkansas falling to Georgia in a shootout, Calipari’s scandal defeating Pitino’s scandal, and Florida eventually getting around to beating Tennessee in the “our orange is uglier than yours” festival. MSU beat Vandy (really?), and LSU squashed some other team from Cajunland. Old Miss and Alabama combined for 105 points in their wins.

The Huskers lost a well fought road game against a very good Hokie team in the final minutes. True conversation between my beloved and I: Her- “Wow, it’s such a tough loss when you’re winning the whole game and then it falls apart in the last seconds”. Me- “I wouldn’t know what that was like at all.”

Other Big 12 action: Rice couldn’t stick to TBPU, Kansas State blew their one chance to shine in the Rose Bowl, Colorado won while Baylor fell to UConn, Rock Chalk pounded the Cameron Crazies, and the Pirate Cap’n missed out on an opportunity to do Blackbeard proud.

On the Left Coast, toOSU played football from Ohio with predictable results, Washington State won (I know, right?), and Oregon unveiled yet another hideous ensemble in their upset of the Utes. Cal’s Jahvid Best looked to be just that against a chippy Minnesota Team opening their new stadium. Arizona evened the “Big T1e1n Pac Ten challenge” at one each by falling to Iowa.

Elsewheres- TCU continues to roll, Syracuse beat Northwestern in this week’s “They have football teams?” bowl, and Pepperdine remains undefeated. Oh, and this has to be the worst idea of the week- UCF planned a tribute for the African American members of Buffalo’s 1958 team, who rejected a bid to the Tangerine Bowl because their darker hued teammates weren’t allowed to play. Coincidentally, UCF also scheduled a “White Out” for that date, and asked their fans to come dressed in all white. Good thinking.

Small schools update: Bacone got fried by Howard Payne, 56-7.

This week’s games include an  Ohio State/Illinois matchup that will prove how much Ron Zook can screw up his team if given a buy week, and an important Kentucky/Florida clash, if the Gators are healthy enough to show up. Maybe St. Tebow can heal them… although, I’m not sure I’d trust his medical experience. Mich1gAAn hosts Indiana, and Kansas welcomes Bret Favrere’s alma mater. Cal and Oregon square off, Nebraska gets whatever’s left from LSU’s blowout, and the marquee game is Miami and Va Tech in a Big lEast showdown. Texas plays UTEP, TBPU welcomes Eddie Robinson’s school, and TCU travels to Clemson. Washington faces off against Stanford, while the Cougs get to be the rebound team for U$C. Notre Ame has to face a Purdon’t team that just lost to a MAC team… That’s not going to end well.

And now, some inspiration for those underachievers in Block O:

High school students. Just sayin’.

UPDATE – Please read this post c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y…it discusses the educational systems of each state, and how well the states educate (or don’t educate) their young minds.  It has deep meaning that could possibly explain the stupid, inbred minds which are unable to comprehend simple matters (in other words, southerners).  If you are a fan of the SEC, have somebody read it to you.  Big words are tough.

——————

Going slightly off-topic, but then again, it’s pretty much right on key with The BBC.

This morning, the United States Chamber of Commerce released their findings on the effectiveness of education in each of our glorious states.  They graded each state on several topics related to the respective states’ educational system.

Buckeye fans, show some pride….our state got a “B”.  As for the rest of the country, let’s go to the chart;

Click on the image for a larger view.

Now, how did the Big Ten states do in comparison to states which hold SEC schools???

A

Minnesota – Minnesota (Big Ten)

B

Ohio – Ohio State (Big Ten)

Iowa – Iowa (Big Ten)

Wisconsin – Wisconsin (Big Ten)

Pennsylvania – Penn State (Big Ten)

C

Illinois – Illinois (Big Ten)

Illinois – Northwestern (Big Ten)

Indiana – Indiana (Big Ten)

Indiana – Purdue (Big Ten)

Michigan – Michigan State (Big Ten)

Michigan – Michigan (Big Ten)

D

Kentucky – Kentucky (SEC)

Tennessee – Tennessee (SEC)

Tennessee – Vanderbilt (SEC)

South Carolina – South Carolina (SEC)

Georgia – Georgia (SEC)

Florida – Florida (SEC)

Arkansas – Arkansas (SEC)

F

Louisiana – LSU (SEC)

Mississippi – Mississippi State (SEC)

Mississippi – Ole Miss (SEC)

Alabama – Alabama (SEC)

Alabama – Auburn (SEC)

No further comment is necessary at this point, is it???

OK, one more comment, if you have a friend who is a fan of the SEC, please send this to them.  But when you send it to them, do one of the following.

  • A) Call them after you send it to them, so you can read the bigger words to them and they’ll understand it better
  • B) Send it to them through the link called “Redneck Translator” so it’s written in their native language

Yes, I believe we now have scientific proof that the SEC is indeed filled with southern inbred morons who can’t read or write up to the speed of an average American citizen.  The United States Chamber Of Commerce has given us that proof.

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