Roy Hall has been gracious enough to write out his Top Ten dont’s for the best week in college football. It’s Ohio State versus TTUN hate week and Roy tells it like it is around the players headed into this game.
The Ohio State-M*chigan rivalry is the best rivalry ever! With that being said, there are certain things that you don’t do during Michigan week. Associating with yellow in any way is unacceptable! So here is a guide, my top 10 things not to do during M*chigan week.
10) When the waitress asks you “Do you want lemon in your water?” the answer is ABSOLUTELY NOT! Alternative: Get extra ice
9) No matter how much your son or daughter may love SpongeBob, he needs to stay in the sea and off of your tv. Alternative: Watch Dora
8)Yellow deer crossing signs…Those deer need to stay in the woods this week! If they come in the street, they are from M*chigan and deserve to suffer the consequences. Alternative: Walk
7) Forbidden Fruits AND vegetables: Pineapples, bananas and corn! Yes, that means no corn in your Chipotle bowl! Alternative: Try black beans in your bowl
6) If its snowing during the game, like in 2002, AVOID ALL YELLOW SNOW! Alternative: Try a cherry icee
5) No scrambled eggs with cheese! If you eat eggs with a yolk you’re not a Buckeye! Alternative: Egg Whites
4) Do not, I repeat, DO NOT let your child ride the yellow school bus to school! Alternative: Drive them yourself
3) I’m sorry all you “Golden Arch” supporters but no McDonald’s! It’s a giant yellow “m!” Alternative: Wendy’s (The entire sign is scarlet)
2) Again, I’m sorry, but if you’re a Hugh Jackman fan, take your posters down. He played “Wolverine” in X-MEN. Not to mention in the cartoon he wore a yellow outfit. That’s the ultimate No! Alternative: Become a Magneto fan for the day!
1) Do not use the bathroom (#1) unless you are fully hydrated! What’s in you will eventually come out of you. If yellow comes out YOU ARE NOT A BUCKEYE! Drink tons of Fruit Punch Gatorade and you should be “clear.” Alternative: Only use the bathroom in the dark. That way you can’t see if you are one if them….